Lessons learned

As I type this entry, our household goods are being wrapped, boxed, and shipped off to our next location. Most of it will go by boat, so we're anticipating not seeing it for a while!

This phase is always a little chaotic because we have to set aside important documents, library books, car keys, and other items we’ll need up to and during the move. It’s quite a mental exercise to think of everything (and keep it sequestered from the movers!), but over the years we have learned a few lessons for the to make it go smoothly-ish.

Wile E and I sitting in the "Do Not Pack" section

Hearing the Japanese chatter over the sound of packing tape has me thinking about all of the lessons we've learned while living in a foreign country. This culture is so drastically different from our own, so we had a pretty big learning curve! 😅

First of all, when in Japan, be decisive. No wishy-washy answers, no changing your mind, just think carefully about what you are going to choose and choose it.

I didn't realize how often we change our minds at the last minute! And that doesn't seem to go over very well here… at best we get a snicker or a denial of the change, but more often the request is seemingly accepted and then never happens. I've missed out on hair appointments and lunch orders and probably several other things by making a last minute change, whereby confusion ensues and I don't get anything at all.

Next, don't be late…as in, be early. If you're less than 5 minutes early in Japan, then you're considered late.

I think the local population is used to the American way, so they are more tolerant, but it's generally disrespectful to not be ready to start at the start time. Sometimes we are explicitly told to arrive 20 minutes early and to consider traffic and parking.

This works both ways too. Trains are perfectly punctual here and if a train is running more than 10 seconds late the operator often issues an apology to passengers. Official “delay certificates” (densha chien shoumeisho) —which can be shown to a boss or teacher—are even available for trains that are more than 10 minutes late.

Unfortunately if you miss the train when it’s on time, that's your problem 😅

That was another we lesson learned…be observant. I missed the train once, because I was not on time (I got there 30 seconds before the train departed), but also I didn't know if it was the right train. As I stood there panicking, the doors closed before I could decide whether to get on.

During the hour I spent waiting for the next train I studied the arrivals board and learned where all of the information was posted. And I'm now much more observant about the name and location of my train!

Honestly, in most situations, if we were in doubt of what to do, the kids would say “just watch what the Japanese are doing!”, and sure enough the answer would be revealed: how to bag groceries, how to stand on the escalator, how to order food… just watch and learn!

Finally, humility.

Learning one of the most difficult languages on the planet (especially as a middle-aged person) requires considerable tolerance for failure. Honestly, I would probably be more proficient by now if I wasn’t so apprehensive to say the wrong thing…

Aside from the language, we were pushed out of our comfort zone when it came to eating, driving, and participating in events. We ended up loving some of the new foods (but definitely not everything); we always found our destination (even if Google maps led us down lots of questionable routes); and every activity became a memorable experience!

Blindly following the GPS

P.S. This weekend the kids and I did a mandala workshop with a Japanese artist. It was very cool to see her designs and the tools she used, and we got to try her methods for ourselves!

Our work!